As a gym “outsider,” and since I’ve only gone twice now, I like exploring the gym culture. I did go that other mentioned in the last post! I walked for 15 minutes and ran for 5 (which is quite an achievement for me!). Today, I went to their only yoga class, and not only was I one of two people who showed up, the instructor made an interesting affirmation for us to follow: “Remember, you are perfect as you are, love yourself for all your flaws, and be totally OK with them.” I wondered if that has something to do with the fact that most people go to the gym to change something about themselves.

Renae (best friend!) came down for her little brother’s high school graduation, and I had a chance to hang out with her! I miss living down the street from her, but I’m happy I can see her when we can. I also took a hike with Matt and our resident Okie, Sarah! I met my parents and my grama yesterday after seeing Renae at Sperling’s Nursery in Calabasas. I got 3 different kinds of tomato plats for less than $6! Cherry tomatoes, Yellow Pear tomatoes and Tomatillos. They’re so cute!

Next goal on the horizon is utilizing (such fancy talk!) my bike! I used to use it all the time my last two years at college. Pasadena is infinitely more bike-able than UCLA, yet I haven’t been inclined to take my bike when I have my car. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve biked to the library, Old Town, work and so forth, so I know I can do it! All I have to do is install my dorky mirror so I can see around me and find my (very ugly) helmet, and I can start biking to work!

Either way, my work has kind of dwindled lately without the added bonus of going to work at Celina’s house to freelance at Tagline!! I have a lot of things on my plate: designing a super top-secret social network, a mini-book of Matt’s essay for our Impractically, Practical show this Thursday in Downtown for the Art Walk (come!), developing a site for one of a verynice design studio‘s pro-bono clients, coming up with new ideas to brand where I freelance… it’s a lot, but designing is a pretty fun field of working.

Typical working environment.

I signed up for a gym membership! Bally’s is only $20 a month. I went in today to check it out (in a dress and jellies, not planning on working out, obviously). It’s not that intimidating. While I was getting my membership card, a 50-something asian lady, an older white lady and a office worker with a tie and bike helmet checked in… no creepy body builders! That made me feel better.

So, after chatting with Matthew about my (non-existant) work ethic, I’ve decided one of my main flaws is sleeping in too long. Today, he woke up at 5 to leave at 6am to go to San Diego. After he left, I thought that I could probably get up right now, I felt awake enough! Then I went back to bed and didn’t get up until 11:30am. I felt groggy and off all day, and I got absolutely no work done.

So here’s the plan: I’m going to wake up when Matthew does, try to run around the block or go to the gym, shower, and then start my day. Matt’s friend Brooklyn said she sleeps in her work out clothes because sometimes the biggest hump is getting into your sports gear. I’m going to try it tonight. Here’s hoping!

Alright! So, the idea of this blog is to chronicle my new lifestyle of being ORGANIZED. Big deal, you think. But really, I know being organized will make me happy, and I’m having a hard time post college. Not that I was a organized then, but my life had a structure until June 11, 2010. Then BAM free time! Job search! Clean the house! Take out the trash! Keep the room clean! Changed kitty litter! Cook food!

Now, I’m not striving to be a housewife. I have ambitions. Lots of them. The problem is I get in my way a lot. My mess makes me feel bad about myself, causes me guilt and stress, and ultimately leads to one finding me in bed watching Scrubs on my laptop at 4pm. It’s a vicious cycle, and lately it’s getting better, but it’s time to step back and do some planning!

When I graduated from UCLA last June, I had my whole life in front of me. Grad school, a house with Matt, kittens, a garden. When I decided grad school wasn’t my thing after all, the job search took over my life. It’s hard to get out of a mindset where the only place you should be in is an office from 9 to 5. My boss/friend from my on campus job at the Hall of Fame, Emily, said that just because I’ll get a job won’t mean my problems will just disappear. I’ve found that she’s totally right.

When I found that I was getting no calls back, crappy interviews, hopes crushed and my ego stomped on, I became more and more depressed. It was like my life didn’t have a purpose if I wasn’t good enough to get a job. I would sleep all day. I wouldn’t work on anything; I’d get jealous of Matt for having work to do. Basically, I was feeling pretty damn sorry for myself. Of course, when I did find a job, I still wasn’t feeling any better. Sure, I had a little bit of income, but Emily was right: I still felt unhappy. With a mixture of a poor working environment (there, I said it) and still not feeling 100% comfortable with myself, getting a job didn’t solve anything.

I started working at the Gap to pay the bills, and was soon let go of the design job I spoke previously of. I wasn’t surprised; it definitely wasn’t a good fit, and I was expecting it. I just wished that the two awesome interviews I’d had the week prior panned out so that I could quit first! Dammit. Oh well. Since then, things have changed. I’m no longer defined by a job; I work at Gap! I come in early and help with displays and mannequins, something I quite like. I work for Matt’s company, a verynice design studio, sometimes pro-bono, sometimes not. Recently, I was hired by a designer who needs freelance help; I come by her place and work looking out her french doors at a courtyard. I’m telling you: search craigslist! That’s how I found her. You just have to be patient.

And here we are! This isn’t supposed to be a depressing blog, I swear. I was just giving a background story. The PLAN is that I will be coming up with a new way to clean up my life: planning meals, planning new ways to spruce up my house, brainstorming about business plans, scheduling yoga classes, figuring out how to work productively. Hopefully it will help you, too! We can give each other tips. I love blogs like Door Sixteen, Design*Sponge, Twig & Thistle, Nubby Twiglet, Gala Darling and Craftzine. And I’m obsessed with Etsy (where I love to find potential engagement rings…). Typical girl stuff. I love to fantasize about IKEA, painting my livingroom green, and tiling my bathroom with vinyl black and white checkered flooring. I dream about having the motivation to take a hike, or sign up for a gym, or even go to any of the yoga classes I have in their own calendar on GCal. I have two black cats named Dexter and Olive, and a very shy guinea pig named Gus. I love my friends, my parents and a good pint of Ben and Jerry’s Coffee Heath Bar Crunch.

Tomorrow is Monday, first day of my new life! For now, I’m going to sleep on it (on the other side of the bed. Matt and I are going to try switching sides to see if we sleep better). Goodnight!